Thursday, December 2, 2010

Not Crazy Enough?

By Tatiana

Last night on the way back home I got caught in a swarm of motorcycles. They were everywhere – in front of my car, on the left and right, behind me. They were zigzagging, speeding up, slowing down, making a lot of noise and driving me crazy! But they also reminded me of my longtime dream to own a bike. As I was pondering the vision of myself going way over speed limit with the wind though my hair and the feeling of absolute freedom, it suddenly hit me. I will probably never own a motorcycle… or at least not in the next 15-20 years or so.

Before I got married and had a baby, I was much more spontaneous, crazy and, I have to say, egotistic. I often did things without much planning or considering how they might affect other people. Being a wife and more so a mom has taught me (or forced me) to be more thoughtful, patient, reasonable, giving and much less selfish. Everything I do, every decision I make impacts my husband and my daughter in one way or another.

That’s why I keep postponing my skydiving, bungee-jumping, rock-climbing and world-exploring ventures. That’s why I didn’t move to Colorado to go to the University of Denver and stayed here in Tampa instead. And it’s not just big thing. Going to the mall, working out or meeting a friend for a cup of coffee requires planning and consideration.

I guess I miss being a little more crazy. But being a wife and mom has opened the whole new world for me. The world in which I never feel lonely. In which there are always people who love me, care about me and wait for me to come home.
Jules knows how to put a smile on my face :)

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